Kissing is not kissing until it is done the right way. Understanding what a good kiss is or becoming good at kissing is not the same as learning to read and write as there are no subjects that teaches kissing styles or skills. It takes a good kisser to spot another good kisser.
Can You Spot A Good Kiss/Kisser?
Have you ever been kissed that you keep seeing yourself day-dream or fantasize about the moment? The thought of it turns you on. That’s what a great kiss can give.
However, spotting a great kiss/kisser can be very tricky as your idea of a good kiss/kisser may not be the same for another. It is very true in this case that “one man’s food is another man’s poison.”
What works for you? Is it a lot of tonguing? Do you like it slow and detailing, a bit forceful or pure aggression? Whichever works for you and gives you gratification, that’s a skill to stick to. But, if you kiss slowly without tonguing but enjoys when your partner uses tongue and a bit forceful, then you need to up your skill and learn to kiss back just same way you enjoy it.
Are You A Good Kisser?
It’s alright to think you are a good kisser or to want to be sure that you are one. A great first step would be to ask yourself, how would you feel, if you are kissed the exact way you kiss others. However, there are other ways you can find out if you are a good kisser.
However, there are other ways you can find out if you are a good kisser.
1. Ask Your Partner: Asking your partner may seem that you are not confident in your art, but what does it matter? If you need to know if your partner enjoys your kissing then to ask him/her. You should also be ready to receive an honest response. Guide your emotions not to take offense at what you will find out and improve on the feedback you receive.
P/S: The idea is to ask your partner and not ask EVERYONE you have kissed, because that will leave you more confused. Focus on asking your current partner, because he/she is the one you are looking to satisfy.
2. Look Out For The Signal: In as much as you know how you feel per time, it will be best to ensure that your partner feels same way. There should be a sync for a great kiss to happen. Observe your partner’s signal per time and use it to your own advantage. E.g when kissing, do your partner focus on the kiss and fondle you face or hair, or does he just stay there, doing almost nothing and can’t wait for the kiss to be over? Notice these signs. They can be the signals you need to know if your kissing is good or need some working on.
3. Observe The Moment: This sounds like the previous point, but it goes beyond observing the signal to reading the moment. The kind of kiss you give in a cinema shouldn’t be the same as the kind you give in the bedroom. If you decide to be all passionate at every time, you will be forcing and over-doing things and this can possibly mean that you are not a good kisser. Always observe the environment/moment and kiss accordingly. Note when your kiss should be light, know when to go deep. Note your partner’s mood to predict when to be smooth and slow or rough and urgent.
4. Learn Of Your Partner’s Preferences: Kissing is a form of love making, same way that touching Sandra’s nipples turns her on, does not mean that touching Kate’s nipples will turn her on too You kiss according to the preferences of your current partner. What your ex likes, may not be the same as what your partner will like. Your aim is to satisfy your partner, so you kiss just the way he/she loves to be kissed. If you pay attention to this, you are on your way to becoming a great kisser.
5. What’s Your Partner’s Reaction After Kissing? Does he/she avoid eye contact or is your partner quick to pull out of the kiss? If your answer to this is positive, then you need to improve your kissing skill. Be open to learn his/her preference. It is okay to let him/her lead sometimes.
Open communication with your partner is key to enhancing your kissing skill. Talk about how you feel with the way he/she kisses you and find out how your kissing makes them feel too. Don’t get offended at their honest answers. Doing all of these will help build your confidence and make you comfortable when kissing and when you’re comfortable, you will be at your best and enjoy yourself.