Ever gone on a date where you just wanted to run within minutes of the meeting - where you really wish you knew the easiest exit strategies for an awful date? You know when your date doesn’t look like what you heard, read or imagined. When they lied about almost everything they told you about themselves. When they lack manners and sometimes just in a bid to impress you, they become a total ass.

I can remember a date where this happened and I needed to come up with the easiest exit strategy fast.

It started when I got to the place we were meeting (a park). I was still expecting my supposed date not knowing he was the guy standing right beside me. In short, he was nothing compared to his voice, choice of words and of course my expectations of him were way beyond what my eyes were seeing.

He hugged me and the first words out of his mouth was "I am sure you have never met someone as cute as me". 

Wow! Really? You are scary, dude.

We went to see a movie on a first date and you know what, he made all the decisions; decided the movie, the snacks, etc. He even had a second plan for us. That was it for me. I couldn’t betray myself by going with him for whatever else he planned for us. I didn’t have an exit strategy and I wished I did, I wouldn’t have wasted such long hours with him. So, I only bailed on his second plan.

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I had to gather some easiest exit strategy for an awful date, just to help myself (and you) when in dire need of it.

Going on dates should be fun and an exciting way to get to know someone new. It’s nice to enjoy a good meal, enjoy good company, and end the night with a blossoming relationship or a solid friendship. However, from my experiences, not all dates come with a happy ending. While a prospective partner may seem totally amazing over chats, calls or through whatever dating app that you are using, they may be nothing like that when it comes to the actual date. Through text and phone calls, a lot can be hidden but face to face it can be nearly impossible.

Annoyingly, your date may probably be having the best day of their lives while you looking for a means to jump off that date. These easy strategies may come off as excuses, but they are totally useful and lifesaving. Accepted, it may not be the best way or cutest explanation to end the date after agreeing to show up and have a good time. But it is rather better to do this politely and gracefully than suffer, all in the name of a date. You will even be doing your date a favor by helping him keep his dignity for another, rather than rob it in that you totally are not feeling the date vibe he may be feeling.

So, when in need of bailing out, one or more of these 16 easy strategies can be you saving grace:

1. Plan an emergency call

It is always advisable to have an emergency call planned out with a friend, whenever you are going out with someone new. The call must be ready to arrive whenever you send the secret code to your friend to bail you out. The call should be such that your friend on the call is demanding that you leave whatever you are doing and be somewhere else immediately.

This may sound cliché but it always works. Fake a low-key emergency that is just serious enough that you have to leave immediately.

2. Behave disgustingly 

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If they are making you miserable, it’s time to share the feeling too. Talk about gross things. Talk about things generally disgusting enough to make him uncomfortable. He can even be the one to bail out on you here. Tell him how you threw up everywhere before coming out and you couldn’t even wait to clean it up. Talk about your menstrual cycle, how you were stained and didn’t even know, you even left your undies unwashed for days and the whole space was messed up with the awful smell. Also, talk about how many times you always have to change your tampon.

 It's embarrassing, but who cares? You want to get out of there, don't you? Saying such things will bring you instant results.

3. Just disagree with everything they say 

This is very unruly. Combat with everything he says. Argue and don’t give up until he gives in. If they mention they love Messi protest that C. Ronaldo is a far better option to him. Not because you hate Messi, but because you are trying to make him uncomfortable. Whatever the topic is, take the opposing view.

4. Do all the talking 

This strategy will require you to be persistent. You may meet a guy who is very lenient and polite, who may not even notice you are doing all talking and literally never stopping.

5. Pretend like they are someone else

Start talking about things that have nothing to do with them. Call them someone else’s name. It doesn’t matter who; the point is to make your date think that you think that they’re someone else. This will definitely make them feel less special or important.

6. Disappear 

First dates can either breed fun or awkwardness. When it is becoming awkward, there will always be a red flag probably within the first 10 minutes of the date. One of the easiest exit strategies will be to excuse you to the restroom and while back there, find the nearest exit. Leaving them thinking that you are a ghost is the most convenient way. Once you leave, send your date a text saying that something came up and add on a seemingly sincere apology. Also, make sure that you have a friend waiting to pick you up.

7. Make up an illness

People make up excuses to get out of everything in life, awful date not excluded. Faking an illness is something that your date can’t argue about. You can always say you are not feeling well; you are experiencing flu-like symptoms. Start laying the foundation of a mysterious illness with a few coughs and sneezes to make it obvious that you aren’t just feeling well. When you think that you have built enough foundation for your fake illness, end the date early stating that you have been fighting the sickness and you have to leave just now.

8. Plan to make them meet your parents or their parents 

Most men are scared of commitment or dating a desperate woman. So, there couldn’t be a better way to exit this awful date than scaring them off with your plans for meeting their parents or yours. Talk about how you want to be married by the end of the year. Then start asking all the personal and serious questions as if you were interviewing him for the job. You will definitely come across as desperate and that is a turn off for most guys, even ladies.

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You can also talk about your psychic friend, and how you don’t ever play with what your friend tells you because they always come true. You can say that your psychic friend told you that you two are perfect together and there is no time to waste than to go ahead and tie the knot. This kind of thing can give jitters to anyone. Chances are he will start feeling uneasy and will bail out on you quickly.

9. Start yawning Continuously 

Start yawning over and over again while your date is talking. Even without saying anything yet, when someone is tired during a date, they are not any fun anyway. They aren’t as energetic or bright as they usually are because they are tired. Start yawning dramatically. You can tell him you have had a long day, you are really tired and you have a lot in your schedule for the next day, so you will have to be up as early as possible. If he is not getting the full picture yet, then keep yawning and yawn it loud. If he is still proving ignorant or Mr. Nice guy, tell him you have to leave because you are very tired and can’t be any fun out here.

10. Come with company

It sounds insensitive right, but the first dates can be very miserable. You can have your friend stay close and signal him or her to come to your table. You are very generous to share your table with someone, aren’t you?

11. Schedule a plan you missed

This may not be very nice, but none of them are. You can always say you have a meeting you forgot you had to go to and you will have to leave soon. It always works. You can start by laying the foundation for this exit strategy. Start checking your time with every passing minute, when you get his attention, gasp at your time and say you didn’t realize how late it is already and you just remembered that you had made plans with your mom (or just anyone you can’t say “No” to) who is in from out of town. Apologize and be on your way as anyone should be able to understand that mom comes first.

12. Be a boring and annoying date

For some people, making up an excuse to leave a date might not be their thing. Yet, you want to be out of that miserable date without giving your date room to request or insist on rescheduling because of your impromptu emergencies (Your excuses). If you feel like making up an excuse is just not your style, simply go with the boring and annoying route. Be the most unimpressed and uninterested date ever. Keep glancing at your phone and watch, check your Instagram, Facebook or any social media that gets your attention, sigh during awkward silences, answer questions in quick replies; do everything you can to turn your date off and who knows, they may be the first to bail on you already.

13. Trip accidentally or intentionally 

If you are out on a date that feels like the worst mistake of your life, excuse yourself for any reason. On your way to or from, make it obvious that you tripped or stubbed your toe or something that is not actually going to hurt as bad as it looks like it did. Whether it was an accident or a calculated risk, make sure it is such a fall that will make your date run to your aid, tell them how your slight injury has ruined your day, tell them all you want to do next is to go home and rest. Your date will feel bad that you hurt yourself and you will get to leave the dreadful date early.

If you are out on a date that feels like the worst mistake of your life, excuse yourself for any reason. On your way to or from, make it obvious that you tripped or stubbed your toe or something that is not actually going to hurt as bad as it looks like it did. Whether it was an accident or a calculated risk, make sure it is such a fall that will make your date run to your aid, tell them how your slight injury has ruined your day, tell them all you want to do next is to go home and rest. Your date will feel bad that you hurt yourself and you will get to leave the dreadful date early.

14. Talk about your ex

When you don’t want to continue with the date, start telling stories. Talk about your ex, the good, the bad and ugly. Don’t stop talking trash about your ex. It doesn’t matter what he thinks. Talking about someone else when you are supposed to be spending the evening with him will be rude. It will also communicate that he is of no importance to you. But I am sure you don’t care.

15. Ask for the bill

Asking for the bill early only shows that you didn’t plan to stay too long. You can either do it the easy way by just asking for the bill or you can do it the hard way by throwing some cash down and just tell them it was nice hanging out with them. You can even wish them a lovely evening.

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16. Be honest

Who said you don’t have the option of being totally honest with them? Well, you have to also know that you will be hurting them with no apologies. It’s always easier in the long run anyway. Well, if you feel there is no chemistry between you two, if you think you guys just don’t vibe, you might just need to follow your instincts. Trust your instincts as that is what they are there for. Simply tell your date that you enjoyed meeting them but you don’t feel like you are compatible. He isn’t a bad guy but he is definitely not the guy for you.

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